bugging me
PostedWhen I got my hair colored and cut, the stylist said something that has been bugging me every since. I am still trying to find "the one" person that can do my hair the way I like. Although I think this woman did a pretty good job, I am not sure I will go back to her.
She has kids in their 20's and is a local. (Maybe that says it all right there "local") She knew I was associated with the military and asked how long we have been with the military. I gave her the short story about how Terry had been enlisted and then came back in as an officer and that we only had 3 years till 20 but that I knew we would be in at least 6 more. I think she asked about the deployments and then she said "Oh I could never do that. My husband is my best friend and we do everything together and I just couldn't spend a year away from him."
Okay lots of people have said the "I could never do that" to me. Well guess what my husband is my best friend and we do everything together. And we survive deployments because that is what he does for a living. He has served in the military in some way since he was 19. He will go over 22 years this month, so do you really think I could ask him to quit so that I would have my best friend by my side to do stuff with??????
I feel so much better.
Ever since you told me what she said it was bugging me too! I'm glad you wrote about it. I like to think of it this way: It's because my husband is my best friend and because of our strong love and friendship that we can get through the seperations! Not that I like it any better... So maybe next time someone says something idiotic like that you can just say, "Our love for each other is strong enough to carry us through!"
So interesting that you posted that. I was going to write about the same thing. Bill and I had a conversation about work or army stuff not to long ago and he told me, "you are my best friend and I want to tell you about every part of my life because I trust you and like that we talk about it." I say that because I have a friend here that told me her husband wasn't her best friend he was her husband. Her best friend...the one she shared everything with was her girlfriend. She could never share everything with her husband. I found that odd and have been brooding over it for weeks. So glad I am not the only couple that fits the best friend category. That is a corner stone of a good marriage, right?
I'm such an odd ball/not sappy :)....I actually keep thinking about how I frequently hear the "I could never do that" comment from non-military people. And if I were not a military spouse I would probably think the same thing. It's not just about the separation, it's about the moves, crazy hours, crazy people we meet (both the good crazy and bad crazy) and every other random thing that we deal with that our non military friends don't. I think at the end of the day we all can "do" anything when we are put in the situation. Non military people typically aren't "challenged" like we are to learn what they are really capable of and they take alot of the simple things in life for granted.
I'd cut her some slack...she's young and from NNY (not really a foundation for a worldly view!)
I do cut her some slack for being from NNY...but she wasn't young, she has kids in their 20's....out of the house. It is a crazy life we lead and most of the times the comments don't matter to me, but I felt like she was saying that we couldn't be that close to our husbands if we can stand to be apart from them so much. It is a very tough life, but I am rewarded 10 fold by the friends I have made during the crazy ride.
Sorry, I misread...I thought it said she was in her 20s and had kids (that's what I get for speed reading!). Wonder what her kids are like?
Even though I'm always a pessimist, I think people who make those kinds of comments are giving us compliments, if in a very back-handed sort of way. We're the toughest group of families out there! To heck with what others think!